Bullying is the act of displaying superiority over a person or group of people in a way that makes the person or group feel inferior. It consists of continuous unsolicited criticism, fault-finding, deliberate exclusion and isolation, humiliation, threats and even physical abuse. Bullying is a problem in all stages of life from name calling on the playground when you are 5 years old, to being shoved in a locker at high school and even as adults in the workplace. However it is during the pre-teen and teen years, when the developing self-identity is so fragile that bullying often has the most damaging long term effects.
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Bullying is a problem that exists in every culture, across both genders and in every socio-economic environment across the world – it is a problem that has no prejudice. So what can be done to combat bullying? The first step is to recognise bullying behaviour. There are many teenagers who experience such extreme forms of bullying that they dread going to school and it impacts negatively on their participation in otherwise valued occupations. However these teens often suffer in silence because they don’t feel they can trust any adults with their concerns for fear of the problem not being handled properly which ultimately escalates the bullying problem. Therefore it is important that once it is evident that bullying is occurring, that it be handled delicately to avoid aggravating the victim as a target.

So how do you recognise if a teen is being bullied? Bullying is usually context specific, and in most cases teen experience bullying at school or via the cyber-world. If you notice the teen has suddenly started to display avoidant behaviour and anxiety around specific activities or places, whereas they appear to be engaging normally in other areas, this may indicate bullying. Do not be confrontational when trying to confirm your suspicions, but rather encourage an open discussion about any problems the teen may be experience in that particular area in their life. You could start by describing what you have noticed in a non-judgemental way. Once the teen admits to being bullied it is vital that you do not react with anger or panic as this reinforced the bullied teen’s victim role. Rather it is recommended that you calmly try to problem solve together with the teen about plausible strategies to overcome the problem.

Some examples are:

• Ignore the bully and walk away
• Hold the anger
• Take charge of your life
• Talk about it
• Find your true friends

There is another element to bullying affecting teenagers of the new generation because of the technological era that we live in. Cyber-bullying is growing concern especially because adults often don’t feel empowered by adequate cyber knowledge to assist their children effectively. Cyber-bullying can also often be a faceless act, because the bully can hide behind the anonymity of the cyber-world to target their victims. Teens often do not realise the lasting effects decisions they make in the present can have on the future.

Some strategies for preventing and combating cyber bullying include:
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Be safe online: protect your passwords, not sharing it with anyone, even friends. Be careful about sharing personal information online

• Tell someone
• Report it to your service provider

Block the bully: social networking sites like Facebook and YouTube take this issue very seriously

• Don’t respond
• Save evidence of unsolicited email, texts, etc.