More and more people are seeking out treatment for depression in the U.S. In the past 15 years, the number of patients being seen has doubled, to 25 million. A sizeable minority of people will battle severe depression at least once – one in four women, and one in eight men. With so many people seeking treatment, it can be hard to find the right therapist for you. How do you choose the right one?

One friend told me to treat it like a shoe buying excursion: try them on until you find a fit. Several other friends who have been in therapy have also given me some suggestions, and here are the criteria that I have heard and found useful in my own search for the right counselor.

• Good listener. Above all, you want to choose a therapist who is a good listener. They should listen more than they talk. Many patients report that this isn’t the case, and that they feel like their therapist doesn’t listen to them. You are paying this person to listen to you, don’t accept one who won’t.
• Open-minded. If you feel like your therapist is judging you during your session, this is not a good sign. You don’t want to have the therapist who is supposed to help you be more positive about yourself making you feel worse instead. You can end up with feelings of unworthiness and lower self-esteem if your therapist is judgmental. Time to switch therapists!
• Helps you find your strengths. Sometimes it is not just about what is wrong, but what is right. Pick a therapist who can help you find what is working in your life, and what strengths you have that you can develop further. This helps self-esteem.
• Holds off on the meds. Many patients report that their therapists were quick to medicate them. Often, therapists wrote out prescriptions during the first session.

Ideally, you have chosen a therapist who will not be in such a hurry to medicate you. You want a therapist to take more time getting to know you so that they can better gauge what medications you need and in what doses.

Sometimes you are just going through a tough time and need help to get you through. Other times it may be just a sympathetic ear you need, someone to talk to. Therapy can provide these things. For it to be beneficial though it is important to choose the right therapist for your needs. You should take a bit of time to shop around before committing to one for treatment.